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Something Wasn’t Right With Mom

Posted by / in Blog, Mild Stage / 6 comments

Thank you for sharing

Our journey through Alzheimer’s disease began eleven years ago. Our family knew nothing about this disease. A new path for Mom was ahead of her and ahead of us.

Everyone loved Mom. She was friendly, outgoing, easy to get along with, and she loved to laugh. There were times we all tried to figure out what was so funny because she was laughing so hard she couldn’t speak. She could make anyone feel good about themselves, even on a bad day. That was her gift. We were always close as I was growing up, and even in my sometimes annoying and moody teen years, we were friends. I was so proud of my Mom.

On February 13, 2005, Dad died very, very suddenly. Earlier that day, Mom and Dad had enjoyed a wonderful day at the beach. They had gone to Ruby’s for hamburgers, and then had a walk around the back bay. Shortly after getting home, Dad had a heart attack. He was four days from retiring as a Los Angeles Superior Court judge.

Life went upside down for Mom and for us. While planning Dad’s funeral service, she couldn’t keep the details straight. We all thought she just couldn’t think straight because she was in shock. Then, at the service and reception, Mom was trying so hard to thank everyone for coming. People she knew for years and years would come up to her and she would say, “I know I should know your name.” One of those guests was my mother-in-law.

What the heck?

My husband, brothers and I would talk and we would ask each other if grieving could cause memory loss. Makes sense, doesn’t it? Certainly, that was it. She was grieving.

It wasn’t grief. It wasn’t part of the grieving process. What was going on? Something wasn’t right with Mom.

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Suggestion:

There is a very informative video made by Teepa Snow called, “Ten Early Signs of Dementia.” It is located at the Resources/Videos page on my website, or you can watch it here.

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I had a nine year journey with my Mom who suffered with Alzheimer's disease. I wish to share what I learned about caring for a loved one who has Alzheimer's and also provide a website with information and helpful resources.

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6 comments
  • Joanne Shoemaker

    May 6, 2014, pm31 9:15 PM
    01

    We have known Helen since she and Bob and Mike and I were newlyweds. We were neighbors with just one house between us. That was in 1950 on Carnell Street in Whittier. Helen was going to Whittier College, but always had time to help me. We had a developmentally disabled child and she would watch our daughter, Kim, when we had an emergency doctor’s appointment and there were many. We remained close friends up until Bob’s and Helen’s passing. We were so blessed to have Helen in our lives. She was the epitome of the word “friend”. God Bless her!

    • Virginia Naeve

      January 18, 2015, pm31 1:39 PM
      02

      You and Mike have always been so special to our family. Love you!

  • Kathy Benderev

    May 8, 2014, pm31 2:20 PM
    03

    Love the You Tube from Teepa Snow. Wish I had seen it before my mom’s dementia became so obvious. I could have shown it to my dad who was covering for mom like Helen’s husband was too. Thanks for this incredible website. I have at least five people I am going to share it with. Lots has been written for the medical community but you are writing for families and loved ones. Thank you so much!!

    • Virginia Naeve

      January 18, 2015, pm31 1:38 PM
      04

      Thanks, Kathy. I keep your mom in my prayers. I hope the people you share this with will find it helpful.

  • Farie Momayez

    October 24, 2014, pm31 10:49 PM
    05

    Virginia ,
    I know the process of writing this blog will help you grieve that will lead you to healing. I also know the information and your beautiful personal touch in writing will assist many.
    Keep writing my friend.
    PS
    I wish I had met your mom. She must have been delightful.
    Oceans of love,
    Farie

    • Virginia Naeve

      January 18, 2015, pm31 1:40 PM
      06

      It does help, Farie. Thanks and I do plan to keep writing. There is lots to say and I hope it will help people going through this.

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